Angry? How many of us have feelings of anger in a day? I would bet pretty much everyone. On the journey to work, someone cuts in front of you causing you to break hard. How do you feel? Annoyed? What do you do? Honk your horn? Shout obscenities? Sit on their tail? These are all common reactions. Are they wrong? We are told it is good to let our feelings out. What we need to be aware of is that anger can be an incredibly damaging force...
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Anger can cost you your job, personal relationships, and even your life when it gets out of hand. However, everyone experiences anger, it is part of being human; so it is important to have constructive approaches to manage it effectively.
Conflict arises out of anger. Whenever two or more people come together, there is bound to be conflict. As with anger, conflict is part of being human. It's normal. We are not robots. We are real people with real feelings. The KEY is how we handle the conflict, how we resolve it. Do you bully the other person until they agree with you? or do you always give up what you want in order to keep the peace? Neither way is conducive to long term peace.
The first way to start to learn to deal with conflict is to recognise and accept that it is normal. It is o.k.
The key is to know how to handle it in such a way that it does not cause damage to ourselves or anyone else.
Dealing with conflict is crucial for every individual and every organisation no matter what the size. If left unchecked or not resolved it can lead to sometimes severe consequences: sickness, lost productivity, attrition and even law suits. Here are some quick tips that can help manage conflict. Sign up for a full easy to follow guide that you can use to resolve conflict, remain friends after and get more of what you want in life without hurting others. As a thank you I will give you discounts of my full programs.
Step 1: Accept that it is a part of being human
Step 2: Separate the person from the problem. Be objective, what is the real problem here? What is someone doing that is causing you to feel angry? That you don't like?
Step 3: Be honest with yourself. Accept yourself for who you are. When we fight who we are it is much harder to make the changes we need to in order to develop as a person and change behaviours that may not be helping us.
Step 4: Now this one takes some practise....put yourself in the other person's shoes.
Try and see the problem from their point of view. Why might that person have cut in front of you on the road this morning? Perhaps they were rushing a sick child to hospital?
When we do this we change our frame of reference and it becomes much easier to find successful resolutions to problems.
Carrie is passionate about seeing people succeed, be the very best they can be and live the life they deserve.